R Madhavan Says He Didn’t Give His Son Free Time—Experts Explain Why That May Not Be the Whole Story

R Madhavan Says He Didn’t Give His Son Free Time—Experts Explain Why That May Not Be the Whole Story


6 min learnNew DelhiJul 21, 2026 11:00 PM IST

In a dialog with Radhika Gupta on the YouTube channel 100 Yr Life Challenge by ACKO, actor R Madhavan mirrored on the values he consciously tried to instil in his son, Vedaant Madhavan, who’s pursuing his dream of profitable an Olympic medal for India.

Talking about his parenting strategy, Madhavan mentioned, “Some of the necessary expertise a toddler ought to have is the angle of gratitude. Though we got here from a really middle-class background, I used to be in a position to afford all the things Vedant wished due to the type of success God bestowed upon me. However I additionally realised that got here with its personal set of challenges.” He added, “I realised there have been two issues I wanted to show Vedaant. One was the angle of gratitude. It’s essential for youngsters to know that they’re privileged as a result of any person else has labored their bottom off to present them this life-style.”

DISCLAIMER: This text is predicated on info from the general public area and/or the specialists we spoke to.

To make the thought extra tangible, he shared, “Generally I’d inform him the wage of my prepare dinner and say, ‘Have you learnt what this toy you’ve been gifted prices? This man must work a complete 12 months, residing in that kitchen, to afford even part of it.’ That struck Vedant loads.” Madhavan additionally emphasised treating everyone with dignity, saying, “The second factor I made positive Vedant did was acknowledge everybody — the liftman, the guard, the drivers, the ayahs. I instructed him to not handle them casually however respectfully, as didis and bhaiyas.” He defined, “It’s not nearly good manners. It’s about situational consciousness. I wished my little one to pay attention to the place he’s, who he’s coping with, and to greet individuals who might not have as a lot cash.”

Recalling moments that reassured him as a guardian, he mentioned, “If the watchman got here and mentioned, ‘Your son is a really well mannered little one. He all the time says namaste to me,’ I felt my job was effectively carried out.” He additional famous, “I can’t let you know what number of instances that has stood him in good stead and helped when he actually wanted it. Individuals bear in mind him as a result of he’s way more well mannered than most others. It helps to get observed in as we speak’s world.”

Madhavan additionally spoke about one other lesson that influenced his parenting. Recalling recommendation from a household he lived with whereas learning in Canada, he shared, “She gave me one piece of recommendation that I adopted wholeheartedly, and it actually labored for my son. She mentioned, ‘Don’t give your little one free time.’” Elaborating on what he meant, he mentioned, “Indulge them in no matter they need to do. The pursuits will change; the extent of dedication will change, however ensure that they don’t have free time until they’re 15 or 16. Allow them to transfer from one exercise to a different.”

Nevertheless, he careworn that these actions ought to stay gratifying: “It needs to be enjoyable. It shouldn’t be a chore as a result of the kid goes to hate it. Whether or not it’s basketball, tennis, golf, kabaddi, spending time with the workers’s youngsters and even studying find out how to make dough—simply ensure that their time is stuffed.” In keeping with Madhavan, retaining youngsters meaningfully engaged can depart much less room for unhealthy influences throughout adolescence.

Story continues under this advert

However how effectively do these parenting methods align with what little one psychology and developmental science suggest? We requested an professional.

Gratitude begins with consciousness

Counselling psychologist Athul Raj tells indianexpress.com, “Kids don’t develop gratitude as a result of we ask them to say ‘thanks’. They develop it after they start to note the individuals and the hassle behind the life they take pleasure in. That’s why conversations about cash ought to by no means cease at how a lot one thing prices. They need to additionally embrace what it takes to earn it and the invisible labour that makes our day by day lives comfy. In lots of Indian houses, youngsters are continuously watching how adults communicate to home employees, drivers, safety guards or the particular person amassing the rubbish. These moments educate them way over a lecture on values ever will.”

How on a regular basis respect shapes lifelong values

Raj mentions, “I usually inform dad and mom that youngsters are learning them on a regular basis. They discover who will get your persistence, who will get your respect and who will get ignored. A toddler might overlook lots of the values you tried to show, however they not often overlook the values you practised. When a guardian greets a safety guard by identify or thanks somebody who works in the home, the kid learns that respect isn’t reserved for individuals with energy or affect. That shapes empathy as a result of they start seeing individuals as people somewhat than by their occupation or social standing. It additionally builds emotional intelligence by serving to youngsters perceive that small interactions have an emotional affect.”

These on a regular basis moments quietly affect the type of good friend, accomplice, colleague and chief a toddler finally turns into. Respect that’s practised constantly throughout social variations turns into half of a kid’s character, not simply their manners.

Story continues under this advert

Why boredom isn’t the enemy 

Click on under to disclose the professional’s reply:

Ought to youngsters all the time keep busy, or is boredom truly good for them?

Raj states that significant actions are necessary as a result of they assist youngsters construct confidence, self-discipline and a way of objective. However there’s a distinction between a toddler being engaged and a toddler being continuously occupied. Many dad and mom develop into uncomfortable the second a toddler says, “I’m bored,” and rush to fill that house. But boredom isn’t all the time one thing that wants fixing. Fairly often, it’s the place creativeness begins.

“When youngsters are left with some unstructured time, they be taught to tolerate frustration, entertain themselves, make choices and uncover what genuinely pursuits them as an alternative of ready to be directed. If each minute is deliberate, youngsters might develop into excessive achievers however battle when life doesn’t present construction. Wholesome growth comes from balancing alternatives to be taught with alternatives to easily suppose, discover and be. Kids want each steerage and house, as a result of independence grows within the moments when adults step again,” concludes Raj.

DISCLAIMER: This text is predicated on info from the general public area and/or the specialists we spoke to.





Source link